Here are the top 5 proverbs as finished by grade one students at a public school in the US
1. Don’t bite the hand that . . . looks dirty.
2. Better to be safe than . . . punch a 5th grader.
3. If you lie down with dogs, you . . . will stink in the morning.
4. Where there is smoke, there is . . . pollution.
5. If at first you don’t succeed . . . get new batteries.
The final frontier, space:
-Space is big. You just won’t believe how vastly, hugely, mind-bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it’s a long way down the road to the drug store, but that’s just peanuts to space. - Douglas Adams
-It is only in the world of objects that we have time and space and selves. - T. S. Eliot
-The Earth reminded us of a Christmas tree ornament hanging in the blackness of space. As we got farther and farther away it diminished in size. Finally it shrank to the size of a marble, the most beautiful marble you can imagine. - James Irwin
This picture of a KKK grandma is worth a few thousand word quote.
-Spring is nature’s way of saying, “Let’s party!” - Robin Williams
-The first day of spring is one thing, and the first spring day is another. The difference between them is sometimes as great as a month. - Henry Van Dyke
-In the spring, at the end of the day, you should smell like dirt. - Margaret Atwood
-To shorten winter, borrow some money due in spring. - -W. J. Vogel
-The weather here is gorgeous. It’s mild and feels like it’s in the eighties. The hot dog vendors got confused because of the weather and thought it was spring, so they accidentally changed the hot dog water in their carts. - David Letterman
I watched a bit of America’s Most Smartest Model this week and it inspired me to dig up some of my fav fashion quotes:
“Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.” - Oscar Wilde
“On matters of style, swim with the current, on matters of principle, stand like a rock.” - Thomas Jefferson
“The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates.” - Dave Barry
“Fashion is a social agreement. the result of a consensus of a large group of people.” - Stella Blum
Here are a few of my favourite Jerry Seinfeld Quotes:
“Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom.”
“Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them’s making a poop, the other one’s carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge. ”
“Sometimes the road less traveled is less traveled for a reason.”
“People who read the tabloids deserve to be lied to.”
Here is Issac Asimov selling a Radio Shack computer with the quote, Get an out-of-this-world deal on my favorite color computer”.
RadioShack Ad Issac Asimov featuring a color computer (1982)
If you don’t have a valentine, hang out with your girlfriends, don’t go looking for someone. When it’s right, they’ll come to you. -
Carmen Electra
Today is Valentine’s Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day! - Jay Leno
These are some famous religious quotes that seem to ring quite true.
- “I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ.”
Mohandas Gandhi
- “When lip service to some mysterious deity permits bestiality on Wednesday and absolution on Sunday, cash me out.”
Frank Sinatra
- “Born again?! No, I’m not. Excuse me for getting it right the first time.”
Dennis Miller
Here are a couple of my favourite sports celeb quotes, the one by Tiger ranks right up there as one of the top funny quotes ever by a sports figure:
- “It’s just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.”
Muhammad Ali
- “You miss 100% of the shots you never take.”
Wayne Gretzky
- “Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.”
Tiger Woods
